Kyiv in my Heart

People I never knew, coming together.
The laughs, smiles,
I now hear the ghosts of their voices.
But the efforts continue, I see new faces.
And each time, they were like family.
United together, to continue and persist,
to never fall down.
We may hear the voices of those once here,
but along with the living, their voices
fuel our hearts. Keeping us strong.
Another day lived through smoke,
but it will never burn out the resilience.

Terrorist

I am met with those evil eyes,
staring at me like I was the crime, I stood my ground.
As the scared child behind me cries,
and the crowd around me, without a sound.

Is helping a human have stable food a crime,
is it such a scary thing to see someone with a smile?
Am I now the antagonist for standing around at nighttime?
Did you really think the dancing frogs were so vile?

'Food not Bombs', feed the hungry for free,
oh no not anymore, that is deemed an offense.
They go door to door like on a killing spree,
tearing apart families for only a few cents.

The world burns by your hand,
but you label me an arsonist.

Helpless sometimes, as I remembered
the last time I breathed in the toxic smoke.
There the crowd was, they never left.
No matter how hard you threw back,

they threw back twice as hard.
With the tears of broken families,
with the memories of murdered children,
forever in everyone's hearts.

Never to be forgotten

Trauma [Part 2]

Push and pull,
wired in our brains,
the strive for connection.
But there's an alarm,
a warning, warning of a past.
And so the connection never comes.
pull
pull
pull
Then letting it jump off of a cliff,
and off to his little cave he goes.
Never to venture out.
His soul, he grips it with force,
'honey let it go, you're going to kill it'
But he puts it further into his rib cage.
run
run
run
Off he goes like a scared little boy,
though his eyes animal-like.
Teeth could have been sharp,
his hands only knew how to break precious things.
The rage he couldn't control, the pain he let flow,
But at night he would
cry
cry
cry
For all the wrong doings, and for
the things he never done.
And all he could ever done,
forever in this cycle.
Blinded, but those eyes could see.
And yet with those seeing eyes,
never met with the hands that would caress.
Always the ones that would make him bleed.
He continued to hold a tight grip
onto his soul.
Till there was nothing, as it faded,
and he was no more.

Nothing but a husk, that was once him.

Trauma [part 1]

Lost lost lost
I could not breathe
I held out my hand
but no one saw
walk walk walk

Lies
Lies
Lies

Like venom on the tongue
forcing me to swallow.
Like the wrenched claws
drawing on my skin.
Like the false words
forced upon my mouth.

Scream
Scream
Scream

But no one!
No one looked no one saw.
No one batted an eye.
I said I said I said
till I forgot who I was

Please
Please
Please

Just let me live.
I am nothing but a shell.
There is no one in this shell,
but flesh and blood.
What more did you want?
Did you like it when you drew on my skin?

Run
Run
Run

I had nowhere to run
Nowhere to hide
You were long gone and locked up
But the scars still bleed without blood.
Forever altered and written on.
This art you left me with

I had to pay the price of my soul.

Богдан

Cradle the small child,
there are no tears left in this man as he cradles that child,
the casket of a child.
No fresh flowers left anymore in that blue vase,
there is no home left that held that vase.

With only a cat in his arms,
and his father in the hospital,
There is no life left in the eyes of this man.
Eyes that used to burn so bright,
and could give warmth to anyone who looked.

Sway gently, the casket of a child,
no close relatives to surround with safety.
All he could hear were machines whispering,
getting closer and closer to his face.
But there are no flying machines around.

And silently, I said goodbye,
while he still remained alive.
Small wings of angels started to grow,
on his back. Soon to take flight.
Away from the pain.

10/20/23

Figurative, I wish it was all a dream.
Trapped, as he lies awake, I see the reflection
of drones from his eyes.
Shoot, shoot, shoot, like ducks from the skies.
But ducks you let live he said,
"Those you do not, ever".

Tiny small fans, usually four on each.
1, 2, 3, 4.
They never stopped coming.
5, 6, 7, 8.
Particles of metal fall to the grown.
Flying like birds, but explosives as hearts.

His eyes showed horror, but words told a different story.
Deep down, it is eating him alive.
Tearing him down, the living person slowly fading.
I still grasped at the spirits of my dead friends,
I try to hold onto his living soul.
As even the living are starting to whither.

I only saw drones from his eyes,
Just shoot, shoot, shoot them all down.
"They wiped away my home town,
killed all the children, men, and women.
they took the last of humanity my father had."
Figurative, I wish it was all a dream.

I wish the war would end

See You Soon Lily

The rain comes with dark clouds and lightning with thunder,
but it also grows the earth beneath.
Flowers flourish and trees shelter you from the sun.

Fall and winter kills the grass and all things living,
but they aren't really be dead.
She always came back next spring.

Solid and rigid metal can hurt a person,
but it helps you cut things down for new things to grow.
Only that day, its purpose was not the latter.

Your voice brought joy and happiness,
but now it only brings me pain.
I see you bleeding from that sharp metal.

Vases of flowers brightened up the room,
only now they wither quickly.
There is a rope hanging heavy right next to it.

Everything, everything, for all things once good and happiness,
they only bring me pain and misery.
They blame me over and over again.

Sleep. Sleep is supposed to give me rest,
but it made me see you hanging from that ceiling.
Over and over and over again.

I could not even hear everyone else anymore,
calling me to see if I was still here.
My voice never answered.

And later I could not answer, even if I wanted to